You're A What????

I've noticed a really strange trend over the last couple of years and it's the phenomenon I call "pseudo lesbianism"
Greek girls tend to be rather affectionate with each other so I was never phased when I'd see a couple of school girls walking together holding hands, or groups of girls having coffee together giving each other an occasional hug. It's normal right?..Girl's nights out where you can talk about girl things.
One day I'm sitting at my usual place at the bar having served yet another group of such girls, when one of them comes up to me and says, "Hi I'm Daisy and I'm a lesbian!" blink blink blink
I mean what do you say to that?.. "Hi I'm Greg so I guess a f*ck is out the question????" I didn't of course, and I smiled and said, "Oh...??.. "uncomfortable silence... "That's nice."
"You don't mind do you?" she asks, Mind?? I really couldn't give a shit so I said, "Dearie I make coffee and serve it to you, what you do in bed it entirely your own business!"
Satisfied with that she went of to her girlfriends, murmured something, and in a matter of seconds they'd paired off and started snogging like crazy.
After about 5 minutes of this I called her over and said, "Listen sweety, I don't care whether you're gay, straight or into big fluffy toys, this is NOT an hotel and those couches are NOT beds. No face licking and semi sex in the shop and this applies to all couples whether they be gay or straight" (Now to all the guys reading this and thinking to themselves ..."What a woose!", I know!!!!.... another male fantasy bites the dust, but believe me guys, there is NOTHING erotic about a couple of 5 foot, crew cut "girls" built like rugby players, sucking face!)
Subdued she went back to her friends, murmured something again, once again in a matter of seconds they had separated and were merrily drinking their coffee and chatting as if nothing had happened. (I thought I was in the "Twilight Zone!)
Two weeks later a familiar face walks into the shop, I have a problem putting names to faces but I knew she'd been here before so I greeted her with a smile, she informed me that she was meeting someone, so I left her at her table and told her to call me when her friend had arrived. Sure enough a few minutes later a young guy arrives and sits at her table, I take them their coffees and leave them, a couple of hours later I see that this was obviously a first date that was going VERY VERY well, ( I kept ducking to avoid the hearts floating around) then it came to me, (picture light bulb exploding) this was Daisy...... the LESBIAN!!!!!!
Gone were the baggy jeans and baseball cap, she was all dolled up in a skirt and wearing MAKEUP!!
I couldn't resist and waited patiently for an opening, at some point the boyfriend disappears to buy cigarettes and I saunter over to her and ask innocently, "Aren't you Daisy the lesbian??" She informed me that now that she's found a boyfriend she was no longer a lesbian and please not to mention anything in front of the guy because she really, really likes him. I told her not to sweat that it was really none of my business so she relaxed, unfortunately the boyfriend came back at that stage and cut my conversation short.
Now I am and have always been totally open minded, but this new trend has nothing to do with exploring your sexuality, something which I would fully understand and accept.
It seems to operate on the same principle that something like smoking did back in the old days. It was "in" to smoke and you smoked because your friends smoked, today it seems to be "I'm cool I'm a lesbian" In fact over the past two years I've met so many "lesbians" that I think that if I was an 18 year old single guy, I'd seriously be considering cross-dressing in the hope of ever getting laid.
Strangely enough, the guys don't have a similar trend, with the exception of the "emo" movement which really did not catch on that much in Greece.
Oops!... I seem to be doing this middle age parent thing (scary!!!) so before I really hit rock bottom and totally ruin my image I once again bid you all a goodnight!!

( You of course know that I really don't go to sleep after writing this blog but that's besides the point......!!!!)